The six degrees of separation. Among other things

The sixth degree (or more likely) the second degree of separation in Colombo fascinates me. The fact that I almost always run into people I know, at the wendt, at odel or at the coffee bean and the tea leaf, the fact that everyone seems to know everyone because someone's best friend used to date someone else's sibling or because someone's grandparents are first cousins twice removed or something equally hard to define. It's neat in a sort of cool, this is "so colombo" way but having been spied upon by Colombo in the past, not always fun. As ding put it once, you can't expect to appear in public in Colombo and not expect everyone who's anyone to not know or something along those lines.

It's the complete opposite here. I wouldn't expect to run into anyone I know at any point and while DC's small and AU smaller, the probability of my running into people that I wouldn't expect at things is a phenomenon that simply doesn't exist. Sure, you can expect to run into business kids if you go to an even at the business frat or international kids at a meeting related to something international but facebook photos that have both your best friend's ex and old school-mate (who might have been the last two people to move in remotely similar circles) tagged in the same photograph is simply uncanny and most likely can only be found in Colombo.

I just find it strange and in a certain sense liberating. Everytime someone asks me what I like most about living here, my first response has always been/is "no one knows me" and it frees me to an extent that couldn't exist in Colombo. I could walk down the road with a male friend and my nosy aunt isn't around to tell everyone that she thinks that I've committed her ultimate crime of having a boyfriend. That one was hilarious. The talk she has with me, about how unimpressed and disappointed in me she was in me because I was no longer a role model for me thirteen year old cousin because I (who was TWENTY freaking years old) walked down the road with some male friends. I doubt I've ever wanted to be free of the "colombo-ness" of it all as much as I did at that particular instance.

I appreciate the openness. The acceptance. Sure I know lots of people who are open and accepting in Colombo and sure I know people who are closed minded and judgmental here but then maybe I've come across more of them back home than I have here. Take the said aunt for instead, who told me in a very heart-wrenching manner, that she was so afraid my coming here to study would fill my head with ridiculous ideas and I'd come back thinking it was ok to move in with a partner and live together. I almost told her that I already thought it was a good idea that made sense and that I wasn't a stickler for the whole no pre-marital sex thing, but then I didn't because I didn't want to cause a family feud over my mother's lack of parenting skills. That's another funny thing. Maybe not so much about all of colombo but more the maternal side of the family.

Sure, mother dearest made a lot of mistakes and sure we have issues and we'll never have the close bond that most of my friends seem to have with their parents and sure I still feel hurt and angry about some of the choices she made and most likely I always will, but I like to think she did a pretty decent job of bringing up two pretty decent kids. Neither of us are amazing but we're pretty decent. I like to think. And we were/are good kids who didn't do drugs or drop out of school or commit crimes or anything. But her side of the family has this annoying habit of pointing fingers at her for (apparently) bringing us up wrong. I personally like to think that said aunt (in particular) is a control freak who micro examines her teenage kids' lives and allows them no independence to grow as themselves but then, that's just my opinion and what do I know about parenting.

I don't know how my post which was supposed to be about the six degrees of separation ended up being more a bitch session about the family but maybe those two facts are simply correlated (I seem to have picked up some stuff off of statistics apparently).